After a few moments Amy was back and Clara was so glad that she seemed to have convinced Alex to stay outside. Clara crawled under the blankets and rested her head on the pillow and Amy lay down next to her, smiling sympathetically.
“Are you gonna break up with him?” she asked in a low voice after a moment.
“I don't know,” Clara admitted, “I promised John I'd give him a chance. Maybe we'll work out now that John isn't a possibility anymore.”
“I seriously hope you don't believe that. Clara, if you're in love with someone else it can't work.”
“I don't know. I need time. It's all so crazy. Right now I just want to sleep, I just want to cry and. . . I just want John.”
The tears came back as soon as she thought about the way he had always held her, like his arms could protect her from anything.
“I had been looking forward to it,” Clara admitted weakly, “When I woke up next to him I thought 'Yes, that's it. That's what I want for the rest of my life.' He is perfect to me in every single way. How am I ever supposed to get over that?”
“Hey, how about I ring up Martha and ask her to get you a sick note for a couple of days? So you don't have to see him at work tomorrow.”
“Thank you,” Clara muttered and closed her eyes.
It was probably a good idea, Clara thought after Amy had left. In her current state she was likely to either break out in tears or grab John by the lapels of his coat and kiss him the next time she saw him and both options seemed like inappropriate behaviour for a school. She managed to get up and unpack her bag and to her surprise she found one of John's shirts in it. Clara thought it must have accidentally landed there when she had undressed him on their first night together. His smell still clung to it and Clara breathed it in deeply. She was missing him too much already and right now she couldn't imagine how it was ever going to get better. Knowing that it was the closest she would ever come to him again, she wrapped herself in his shirt, and his smell, before she went back to bed.
Clara attempted to sleep but a short while later there was a knock on the bedroom door.
“Don't come in,” she replied, “I'm contagious.”
Still Alex cracked the door open. Clara turned her back on him.
“Amy said you were sick,” Alex said as if he didn't really believe it, “Is everything alright?”
“No, I just want to sleep,” she grumbled in reply.
“Can I get you anything? Tea? Water? Soup? Draw you a bath?”
More tears rolled down her cheek. Alex was being so nice and all Clara wanted was for him to go away. Yet she noticed that she was indeed hungry after only having eaten breakfast today.
“Soup sounds nice.”
“Okay, bowl of soup coming right up,” Alex paused and sighed, “Are you sure that there is nothing else? Just a stomach flu?”
“Just a stomach flu,” Clara lied.